


we were toy soldiers in a make believe war

by sheApunk89



Series: Good Soldiers Soldier On [2]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, CT-7567 | Rex Needs a Hug, Cody is a Good Bro, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Men Crying, Men acknowledging feelings, Obi-Wan Kenobi Needs a Hug, Post-Order 66 (Star Wars), and hugging, and whatnot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-28
Updated: 2020-12-30
Packaged: 2021-03-11 04:22:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,827
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28389231
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sheApunk89/pseuds/sheApunk89
Summary: With the dim emergency lighting above the  door he could just make out Rex's quizzical raised eyebrow."I'm sorry I wasnt there." Rex's Adam's apple bobbed, Cody plowed on. "I swore I always would be and I wasnt. I'm sorry for that."OR: [A series of reunions where nothing goes quite according to plan]
Relationships: CC-2224 | Cody & CT-7567 | Rex, CC-2224 | Cody & Obi-Wan Kenobi, Obi-Wan Kenobi & CT-7567 | Rex
Series: Good Soldiers Soldier On [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2077983
Comments: 22
Kudos: 157





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to everyone who read and reviewed the first part of this series!
> 
> CW: Brief suicidal ideation and mention of off screen suicide

“Cody.” Rex raised his hands, blinking rain out of his eyes. The rain drummed a loud staccato beat off his armor plates, and his blacks soaked to the skin.

Ten paces in front of him his closest brother stared back at him with a stranger’s eyes, rain traveling in little rivers down his face, following the path of his scar.

“CT 7567 you are under arrest for defection and aiding and abetting the escape of a traitor.”

Their buckets lay abandoned in the soaked mud, dislodged in the scuffle when Rex had attempted to surprise Cody and get a sedative into him before he could fight back after he separated himself from his men. But even at his best Rex had been hard pressed to beat Cody at hand to hand and he…was not at his best.

“Cody. Cody please.” Rex barely recognized his own voice, rough from disuse, broken and pleading. He only ever talked to his med droid now and only when he had a brother in need of dechipping or, more likely, because Rex had hurt himself in ways too severe to treat on his own in an attempt to rescue a brother that didn’t realize he was being held hostage.

“Put down your weapon CT 7567.”

Rex blinked hard, Cody’s continued use of his serial number twisting a knife in his gut that didn’t need twisting.

“Cody it’s me. It’s Rex, don’t you remember?” He had to remember. He had to find a way to remember. Rex had spent five years alone, searching for his brother (for any brother, yes, but especially Cody) and now he had and…he had really hoped it wouldn’t be like this.

“Don’t you remember Kamino, Cody? We swore we’d always be there for eachother. We’d either finish this war or march on together.” He swallowed hard, well aware he was crying but thankful for the rain that made it impossible to tell. “But you weren’t there. So I couldn’t go. Please, please tell me you remember. Tell me my brother isn’t gone.”

“I’m no one’s brother, CT 7567. And I don’t remember anything except the warrant that’s been signed by the Chancellor and Lord Vador himself for your arrest. If you do not put down your weapon I. will. shoot. you.”

Slowly, Rex lowered his hands to drop his blaster. The last shreds of his hope, his resolve, reason for being (because if he couldn’t save Cody what was the point?) were washed away by the rain and the cold voice of this man he didn’t know anymore.

“Good. Now put these on.” He pulled a pair of binders out of his belt with one hand and tossed them into the mud in front of Rex’s boots.

Rex let his focus go to the barrel of Cody’s blaster. An upgraded plasma rifle. Cody had always favored them over pistols.

“No.” He may not have made any sound at all. He was so *tired. 

“Did you not hear me? I have authorization to kill you if you resist.”

Slowly Rex brought his eyes back up from the weapon to his brother’s face.

He’d shot at his commander. He’d buried his brothers. He’d been betrayed by his General. By his own mind. He’d spent years with no one but a droid for company. There were days when the barrel of a blaster looked like freedom.

On a muddy, rainy planet in the outer rim…it was shaping up to look like one of those days.

“Do it.”

The first humanity in the other clone surfaced when he startled, lifting his head in a curious tilt. “What?”

“I said ‘do it’. Shoot me. If that’s what you need to do, what your _duty_ demands, then do it.My men are gone. My commander is gone. My Gen-” he choked, pressed on, “my General is gone. And you have made it _abundantly_ clear my brother is gone. I’ve got nothing left. So shoot me.”

CC 2224’s finger tightened on the trigger, his programming and duty and good soldiers follow orders ringing loudly in his head.

But there was something else there too. A tug, a familiar voice from a half remembered dream filtering in through his foggy thoughts.

And it was in agony.

_“Shoot me!”_

CC 2224 wanted to, but he found that he couldn’t.

The rifle dipped off it’s mark. Confused, Rex watched it fall to the ground, and his brother dropped to his knees, clutching his head.

“Cody?” Rex whispered, frozen, his body felt too cold and too heavy to move so he could only watch as Cody rocked back and forth, chin bowed to his chest.

Finally, after what felt like an eternity, he looked up. Eyes red rimmed, face strained and anguished.

But _Cody_.

“Rex…”

The word was barely audible, but Rex’s reaction was instantaneous. He ran forward, crashed into the mud beside his brother and pulled Cody up againsthis chest, holding him tight.

“Cody? Are you with me?”

“Rex…I’m…Rex…”

Rex nodded. He needed to call his ship. Needed to get MD-14 to get the OR ready. Needed to get moving before Cody’s men came looking for him.

Instead he pressed his face into Cody’s soaked hair while his brother shook, fingers digging into his bright white armor plates until his arms ached from exertion.

“I’ve got you brother. I’m not letting go. Never letting you go.”

* * *

Rex dropped a thick blanket around Cody’s shoulders and his brother shrugged down into it slightly and wrapped his hands around his still untouched mug of black caf.

“Is it always this cold on your ship?” He groused. It was easier to be irritated, focus on the discomforts of Rex’s second hand threadbare freighter instead of…everything else.

“Not always, but the heaters been out for the better part of three months standard. I’ve asked Emdee to look at it but-”

“I am a _medical_ droid. I am not programmed to repair heating components.”

Rex rolled his eyes. “I’m trying to help you expand your horizons.”

“I practice brain surgery on a regular basis, you’d think that would be enough.” The droid did a little head twitch meant to simulate rolling it’s eyes and rolled out of the room.

Cody snorted and sipped his drink. “Charming.”

Rex slid down to sit beside him, knocking their knees together and tipping his head back against the bulkhead.

“You should have met him before the reprogram. That is actually a vast improvement.”

Cody nodded. “Oh I know. They only replaced that model on the cruisers last year. I’ve had more than my fair share of run ins with his friends.”

Rex turned his head slightly to look at his brother, still overwhelmed by the idea that he was here. _Cody was here_ with him. Finally.

“You feeling okay?”

Cody reached up to touch his bandage, covering the fresh wound on his temple. “Bit of a headache. Nothing too bad.” He looked at his caf and then turned to catch Rex’s eyes.

“How many times have you done this?”

Rex sighed deeply. “A handful. It’s hard to find brothers who are in small enough groups for me to handle on my own. Can’t very well take on an entire platoon.”

Cody nodded. “You’ve gotten pretty good at it. You and your droid.”

“We do alright.”

“Have you gotten anyone I would know?”

Rex reached up to massage his neck. “First 212th I found was Gregor, recognized him from your stories. He was alone and injured. The order didn’t activate right in his brain, some kind of preexisting trauma Emdee said. I kept him with me for a while, didn’t trust him on his own. But when I picked up Wolffe they hit it off. Balanced each other out in a weird way.” Rex shrugged.

“They found a place in the mid rim and were going about getting credits together for a ship or piece of land or something. I got a couple men from the 91st and the 277th at different times and,” he stopped and shrugged. “Well anyway most of them end up trying to find a place to settle down out of the way. Or join up with some of the rebel groups popping up.”

“They don’t stay with you?”

Rex shook his head. “It’s dangerous work. But I couldn’t stop. Not without you.” He looked over at Cody. “Maybe I can at least slow down now. Stop and breathe for a bit.”

Cody leaned over to bump his shoulder. “Thanks, by the way.”

Rex grinned. “Yeah, you owe me for this one big brother.”

Cody nodded but slowly let his smile fall. “I’m sure it’s a long shot but…you haven’t gotten any leads on Bly…have you?”

Rex’s smile turned brittle and he cleared his throat, turning to look at the floor. He’d hoped to avoid this until Cody was a little more recovered, but Rex couldn’t blame him for the question. Batchmates were always the first question after asking about their General. At least in Cody’s case he already knew most of that part.

“Yeah,” Rex said, voice quiet. “About a year ago. I couldn’t believe I’d found him.” Rex paused for a long time and Cody, sensing the story didn’t have a happy ending, didn’t push. “He was with Aayla when the Order came down. Felucia. Point blank range. She never saw it coming. He…just couldn’t live with that.”

Cody closed his eyes. His chest ached.

“It would be easier if the chips erased your memory. If you could get it taken out and the memories go with it.” Rex’s voice continued, dragging roughly across the words as if they were worn in steps on a dead end path, an argument he knew he couldn’t win. “But they don’t. You remember everything and know that at the time you…it felt right. Felt like the right choice, the right thing. Like there was another person in your body doing everything that suddenly just…goes away. And leaves you to pick up the pieces.”

Cody stared down into his cooling mug of caf, blinking away the image of red dirt and the frightened squealing of a Boga in free fall. He cleared his throat and nodded. “Yeah.”

After a minute or two of silence Rex seemed to come back to himself.

“Anyway. You’re here now and I’m glad.” Rex turned to Cody with a smile that his brother was polite enough to pretend was real. He squeezed his shoulder. “I thought when you’re feeling up to it we could go visit an old friend of yours.”

Cody’s eyes widened. “The General? You really think he’s alive? You know where to find him?”

Rex stood, moving toward the door of the small medbay, and his grin turned genuine and mischievous. “I have a hunch.”

Frowning, Cody got up and followed his brother who was already settling into the pilot’s chair in the cockpit a few paces away.

“Where?”

“Tatooine.”

“Tatooine? Why Tatooine?” Cody leaned against the bulkhead, hoping it came across as casual and not ‘still dizzy from emergency brain surgery and should probably be sitting down’.

Rex spun around in the chair to fiddle with some controls on the auxiliary panel. "Theres two things I know about Anakin Skywalker.” Rex glanced at him, fake grin firmly in place. “He hates sand and he’s from the desert planet of Tatooine.”

Cody frowned. “Okay?”

“So if I wanted to hide from him, and had any interest in spending the rest of my life dragging my shebs across the desert for the rest of my life, I’d choose Tatooine.”

Cody sighed and, taking the flaming headache burning up his brain for the warning it was, settled down in the co-pilots chair, but pulled his blanket tighter across his shoulders instead of reaching for the controls.

“Right…but why?”

“Because it’s the last place Vader will ever think to look.”

Cody’s gaze snapped to his brother, but Rex had his eyes glued to his controls, face a carefully constructed mask.

“You know.”

Rex’s hands stilled and he stared at the engine temperature readouts without seeing.

“The footage of him marching the 501st into the temple played on a loop for days on the holonews. It’s funny how many times it took me to see it before I believed it.”

“Rex…”

“If Kenobi’s anywhere,” Rex interrupted before Cody could continue in that small, sad voice, “he’ll be on Tatooine.”

Cody pursed his lips, recognizing Rex’s signs for not wanting to talk about something and decided now wasn’t the time to push.

“How do you know?”

“Because Codes, if theres one person in the Galaxy who knew my General as well as I did,” he paused, a funny smirk on his face. “It’s your General.”

* * *

They spent the long nights of hyperspace travel on their way to Tatooine curled up together on a single bench in Rex’s small sleeping area, like when the 501st used to hot bunk with the 212th aboard the Negotiator. Like when the thunderstorms roaring over Kamino drove a tiny shaking cadet out of his pod and into his older brother’s. 

"Rex?" Cody kept his voice low. The blonde was on his side facing the other way and Cody didn’t want to wake him if he'd already fallen asleep.

"Yeah?" He answered immediately in his normal tone. He appreciated Cody's thoughtfulness and didn’t mention that he never slept for more than sixty minutes at a time. That he didn’t sleep well in the pitch black dark of space. That he was afraid to close his eyes and open them again to find the other side of the bunk cold and unused again.

"I'm sorry." Cody sighed. He tightened his fingers in the scratchy polythread blanket.

Rex shifted slightly to tip his head back toward him.

"I told you not to be sorry about that, you weren’t in control." Rex protested, thinking of their altercation on the planet. Really he just couldn’t stand the idea of his brother feeling bad for what turned out to be one of the happiest moments of of Rex's short life.

His brother had been returned to him.

"Thats not what I mean."

Finally Rex gave in, rolling over to his back so he could see Cody, who shifted to his side and propped up on an elbow so they would both have room.

With the dim emergency lighting above thedoor he could just make out Rex's quizzical raised eyebrow. 

"I'm sorry I wasnt there." Rex's Adam's apple bobbed, Cody plowed on. "I swore I always would be and I wasnt. I'm sorry for that."

"Cody-"

"I'm sorry you've been all alone for all this time. I can't imagine what that was like and I-," he broke off, but Rex didn't try to interrupt again. Cody knew Rex had spent at least some of the time since the Order with Ahsoka, but the company of a natborn, even one as precious to Rex as the former Commander, was not the same as being among Brothers.

"I'm sorry about Bly and Fives and Echo. I'm sorry about Jesse. I'm sorry about Kix. And," he swallowed hard, his eyes burning, "and I'm so sorry about Skywalker."

The blank hardness of Rex's face didn’t falter, but when he blinked a tear ran out the corner if his eye, down into his hair and ear. His throat clicked when he swallowed.

He was silent and still for so long Cody started to worry.

“Are you alright?”

Rex nodded. He nodded and nodded and nodded and Cody suddenly realized he was shaking. With a soft noise he toward him and Rex flew forward, collapsing into his brother's chest.

For near enough to five years Rex had been alone. A good soldier who didn’t follow orders. He'd buried his brothers, buried his memories, and soldiered on and on. And every time a piece of himself buckled under the pressure he picked it up and clutched it close, bleeding and scraped raw by his own jagged edges.

And in a single moment, his closest brother reached across the void and pulled him in. Cody took on the burden of every broken piece that Rex had left and Rex realized those broken pieces were all that had been holding him together.

"I've got you. I've got you now, Rex," Cody whispered into his hair, clutching desperately at his skin the same as Rex was doing to him. He thought back to when Rex had held him as they both sank into the mud on that planet. “I’m here now vod’ika and I'm not letting you go either.”

Rex sighed and cried and let himself finally (beautifully, completely) fall apart.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cody and Rex arrive on Tatooine. There is more waiting for them there than they realized.

It only took a day on Tatooine, asking more questions than was probably prudent, to get the lead they’d been looking for. A lone moisture farmer lived out on the edge of the badlands who rarely came into Mos Eisley and never had visitors.

It took exactly no time for Rex and Cody to point their second hand speeders in the direction the locals pointed and set off.

For his part, Kenobi didn’t seem as surprised as Rex expected. Though he still nearly fell off the batha he’d been riding when Cody and Rex unwrapped their faces.

It was like a homecoming and a remembrance all in one. They couldn’t stop looking at each other, couldn’t stop crying and laughing and asking _but how?_ Eventually the Jedi ushered them into his small dwelling nestled in the shadow of a rock formation and spooned leftover vegetable broth into bowls. His hands shook as he passed them around and Cody and Rex didn’t comment.

The three talked for a while, but when Cody started crying for the second time since they'd arrived, chest wracking sobs wrapped in guilt and pleading for forgiveness, Rex squeezed his neck and excused himself, leaving the former Commander to the former General as they'd always preferred.

Outside he shaded his eyes from the evening sun, still baking the land in heat and cursed the sand that flew into his eyes with a sudden burst of wind from around the side of the house.

Blinking hard, he scanned the rocks that curved protectively around either side of Kenobi's little hut. Something caught the light up on the ridge and his hackles rose.

There had been reports of raiders in this area, not to mention Tatooine was a known hideout for galactic scum of various shapes and sizes.

And Rex was due a good workout.

Casually, he made his way around behind the house and disappeared toward the back side of the rock face and started to climb.

A few minutes later he'd gotten close enough to make out the shape of a body pressed into the dirt, small boots and dessert appropriate tunic and leggings poking out from beneath a bush.

The creature seemed small. Jawa maybe?

“Can I help you with something?" Rex growled, looking down the sight of his favored pistol.

A tiny yelp erupted and the figure scrambled back out from under it’s hiding place. Rex was suddenly looking into huge, terrified blue eyes under a mop of blond hair. Startled, he took a half a step back.

"A kid?"

The child's eyes widened even further, giant white saucers in the middle of a pink face and round cheeks. He squeaked again and whirled around, stumbling in his haste to escape and nearly fell.

"Hey hey, wait!"

Rex's hand shot out and caught the child by the arm, preventing both his fall and his escape.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry! Please don't tell I wont come back I swear!"

"Calm down kid, just take it easy. You're not in trouble." Rex soothed, easing his blaster back into his thigh holster and going to one knee to be on eye level.

"Yes-huh I am 'cause I'm not supposed to be here, my Uncle Owen says so." The kid assured him, squirming in Rex's grip.

"I see, well, in that case." Rex let go and the kid shot off. He only made it about ten steps before he stopped and turned around.

"You wont tell, will you?"

Rex smiled, not bothering to clarify that he didn't actually know any 'Uncle Owen's.

"Well that all depends," Rex stood and glanced in the direction the child had been looking with his worn out set of binocs. Directly into Kenobi's homestead. "What exactly were you doing up here?"

The kid shrugged, returning easily to Rex's side, innocent and trusting.

"Looking for whatever I'm not supposed to see." 

"Hm?"

"Uncle Owen says this place is dangerous, thats why I’m not supposed to come out here. But the Raiders don't like this area and you can always hear Jawas coming. The only one here is Old Ben, and he's not scary." The child shrugged again and offered up his binocs. "So I figure theres gotta be something else. And I wanted to see what it was. I hope it’s a Krayt Dragon. That would be wizard.”

Rex took the proffered device and scanned the horizon and surrounding area.

"I don’t know kid." He handed the binocs back. “I don’t see any dragons. But if your Uncle says it’s dangerous here, you should listen to him."

The child's shoulders dropped and he nodded. "I guess,” he agreed, dejected that his adventure had been cut short.

Rex wasnt sure what possessed him to do it, but he reached out and ruffled the kid's hair, earning himself an indignant huff when the kid swatted his hand away.

"Whats your name anyway, Shiny?"

"Luke." He said, wrinkling his nose. “I’m not shiny." He glanced down at himself. "I need a bath. Stupid sand gets everywhere."

"You're right about that. I'm Rex." He smiled. "Luke is a good name."

"Thanks," Luke beamed. "Not as good as my last name."

"Oh? And whats that?"

"Skywalker. Get it? Like walking the sky? And thats what I'm gonna do someday. I'm gonna become a pilot and fly through the sky and visit every planet until I can swim in every ocean there is. Have you ever seen an ocean?" The kid was babbling, too excited and distracted to notice the way his companion had gone deathbed still and lost all the color in his face. "Uncle Owen says-" a soft, feminine voice sailed across the open sands and Luke's eyes went wide again. "Thats my aunt. I gotta go. It was nice to meet you, Mr. Rex!"

Luke turned and bounded down the rocks and sand, around the scrubby desert bushes that dotted the path as he made his way down the ridge. Rex still hadn’t breathed when the kid disappeared around the escarpment. Didn’t breathe again until a heavy hand landed on his shoulder.

"Who was that?"

Rex turned around, but Cody didn’t recognize the haunted look on his brother's face.

"Rex?"

Rex didn't answer, but his eyes shifted to land on the decrepit building at the bottom of the rocks. His face twisted and he was gone.

Obi Wan was barely through announcing what they would have for dinner when a hand made of durasteel clamped down on his shoulders, whipping him around to slam his back into the wall.

"Is it true?" Rex asked, hissing venom and breathing fire like Kenobi had never seen.

"Rex! What do you think you're doing?" Cody came up behind him, trying to pull Rex back but he wouldn't budge.

"I asked you a question Kenobi!"

"I don’t know what you're talking about." Kenobi seemed more confused than afraid, which Rex was privately pleased, but more readily seething, about.

"Stand _down_ Captain!"

"I don't take orders from you anymore!" Rex snapped over at Cody, who was immediately taken aback by the insubordinate tone. The distraction lasted less than a second and Rex was back nose to nose with the Jedi. "Is Luke Anakin's son?"

Silence rang out in the tiny hut broken by Rex's harsh breathing and the creak of leather as Cody slowly turned toward his General. 

"What?"

There was no confusion on his former General's face. No disbelief. Just resignation and sadness.

"Yes." Kenobi croaked finally.

Rex's jaw went slack and his fingers loosened in Kenobi's robes, allowing the man to return to his flat feet.

"Does he know?"

"Luke or Anakin?"

Rex looked like he couldn't decide whether that was a real question he should answer or if he should finish choking Kenobi for being coy.

Instead, Cody responded, "Both?"

The man's eyes flicked quickly over and he freed himself from Rex's grip with a small jerk of his cloak.

"No. Luke doesn’t know."

"And Anakin?"

Kenobi walked away to bend over the sink, letting his chin drop to his chest.

"I believe the Emperor led him to believe Padme and the children died during birth."

"Children? Plural?"

Kenobi nodded, his shoulders hunched low. He didn't look like the proud, powerful Jedi Cody had once served beside anymore. He was just a man now, a man carrying the weight of a galaxy on his shoulders.

"Twins. Luke has a sister."

For the second time that day Rex felt the blood all drain from his head, sound dropped out and his vision got fuzzy. He stumbled toward the table and fell into a chair.

"Twins."

Rex had his face buried in his hands and Cody watched his former general slowly collapse on himself.

“Where is she?”

Kenobi didn’t lift his head. “On Alderaan. Adopted by Bail and Breha Organa.”

“You separated them.” Rex glared at the former Jedi, lips curled back in a silent snarl. “How could you do that?”

“I didn’t have a choice,” Obi Wan spun around and Cody couldn’t help but feel gratified by the fire in his eyes, even if defeat still rang out clear in the slump of his shoulders and shaking hands. “I had just fought and done my best to _kill_ my Padawan. Who turned to the dark side and murdered young,” his hand flew to his mouth and he pressed a fist to his lips. “younglings. Padme was dead, the Order was in ruins. You weren’t there, you have _no idea_ what it was like.”

Slowly, Rex raised his head, his gaze locking onto the former Jedi’s with the focus of a DLT-19x laser sight.

“I don’t know?”

Obi Wan seemed to immediately realize his mistake and closed his eyes. “Rex that’s not what I-”

“No no no, you’re right.” The geniality was cold, the smile too sharp as he slowly rose from his chair. Cody stood poised to jump, ready to put himself between his General and any threat, even his brother. The way he had a thousand times before.

“I have _no idea_ what that was like. Because I was on the other side of the galaxy shooting, doing my best to kill, my own men. _Again_. I was watching my brother’s last shred of humanity be stolen from them. Watching them be turned into the droids we were always accused of being. So you’re right, I wasn’t there. But _do not_ tell me what I know.”

With one last dark look Rex turned and slammed out the front door, leaving the remaining two men behind in the suddenly oppressive silence. 

“You should go after him.” Kenobi rasped, dropping into the chair opposite the one Rex had just vacated. He put his elbows on the table and pushed his hands into his hair, hiding his face from view.

Cody glanced toward the door and then back, choosing instead to cross the room and sit in the chair Rex had left. “If he wanted to talk he would have stayed inside. Sometimes its best to let Rex sort himself out.”

Kenobi didn’t respond for a long time and Cody sat still in the silence. It felt like an old habit sitting there, letting the Jedi have a few minutes to get himself back under control. So many evenings during campaigns had been spent like this, Cody watching over his General, as his General came to terms with what it really meant to lead an army in a war.

“I wanted to keep them together.” He said finally. Cody leaned forward slightly to better hear the softly spoken words. “Master Yoda thought it best they were parted and I was too deep in my own grief to argue.”

He sat back in his chair with a weary sigh and dropped his hands into his lap.

“But I didn’t know there was anyone else. If I had known about Rex I would have sought him out. Surely he knows that?”

Cody shrugged and folded his hands on the table in front of them. He tried not to shift, uncomfortable without the weight of his armor. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d consciously gone without it.

“Of course he knows. But he also just found out that the man he considered his brother in more ways than one, who is dead in every way that matters, had children that he knew nothing about. Ad’ike that he has effectively abandoned.”

“But he didn’t know-“

“That doesn’t take away the sting.”

Kenobi took a deep breath and shook his head, his blue eyes haunted and distant.

“It’s funny. I was raised a Jedi, a peacekeeper. But I’ve been fighting war longer than I’ve been keeping peace. These last five years I’ve had all the peace I could ask for. It seems wrong to miss it.”

“What? The good old days?”

He looked up to meet Cody’s eyes who was giving him a small rueful smile.

“Yes.” He nodded, “It’s wrong, isn’t it? Given the ugliness of war.”

Cody shrugged again. “It was no picnic but...at least we were together. Young. A measure of control over our lives, such as they were. What’s not to miss?”

Kenobi laughed quietly and rubbed his beard and face, pressed his palms over his eyes.

“I miss them.” He admitted in a small, watery whisper.

Cody wasn’t sure if he meant the Jedi or the 212th. He decided it didn’t matter.

“We've all lost a lot.” He sighed, failing in his effort not to fidget and reached to scratch that spot under his ribs where the Imp chest plates always pinched his skin.“But Rex has spent the last five years living with that loss, just like you.”

Kenobi, unaccustomed to warmth (of any kind, anymore) arranged and rearranged his cloak around his legs.

“So have you.”

“Yeah,” Cody nodded,“but I've had the advantage of thinking it was what I wanted.”

“Its still a violation.”

“Not a new one.”

The Jedi inhaled sharply and the sadness of his face was like a balm to Cody’s soul and a knife to his heart.

“Oh Cody-“

“Nah,” Cody shook his head and sighed as he rose to his feet. “I’ve shed enough tears over things I can’t change for one day.” He moved to close the distance between them and reached out to take a handful of Kenobi’s robe. He tugged him forward.

Their foreheads thunked together and Kenobi grunted.

“Cody, really.”

“Oh quit your complaining.” Cody stood up, tugging down on his borrowed not-at-all-armored jacket. “Now I’m going to go catch some sleep in your rack. And you’re gonna go convince that stubborn di’kut brother of mine to come inside before he freezes on the Tatooine desert sand.”

Kenobi huffed and Cody squeezed his shoulder as he passed and went to make himself comfortable on the small cot in the corner of the room. He chuckled when Cody gave him his back and immediately feigned sleep.

“I liked it better when I outranked you.”

Cody snorted. “I bet you did. Now go.”

* * *

Outside Rex had climbed to the top of a small dune overlooking the sprawling desert sands. In the distance a soft glow reflecting up on the night sky indicated the location of Mos Eisley.

Rex didn’t move when he heard the footsteps approaching from behind.

Took solace, in fact, in the sound of feet sliding through grains of sand instead of rolling across deck plates. And breathed in the noise of the life in the desert instead of the silence of space.

“That took longer than I expected.” He groused. “You used to be much more of a mother hen, Cody.”

“Ah, it wasn’t just me then.”

He looked up, surprised to hear a stiff Coruscanti lilt rather than his brother’s familiar accent.

“I’m sorry, I haven’t any caf.” Kenobi said with an apologetic smile.

“Uh, it’s fine,” Rex swallowed and reached up to take the proffered mug. “I’ve learned not to be quite so picky.”

Kenboi settled down next to him and wrapped his hands around his own mug.

“I’m sorry, for how I reacted back there.” Rex had his elbows rested on his knees, staring down into his mug.

“Don’t be. You have every right to be angry.”

“But not at you.”

Kenobi sipped his tea.

“During the war,” Rex began, tapping his index finger on the rim of his steaming mug. “No matter how many brothers I Remembered, how many armor plates I scrubbed clean of paint to be shipped off to the next shiny...I told myself it was ok. It was worth it because they died for a higher purpose. For the republic. For freedom. Turns out that was a lie too.” He finally lifted his mug and took a long drink. "Chancellor was playing Chess and the rest of us were playing at war." 

Theres was silence between them for a long time. Thick and heavy but easier to bear for the mere fact that it was shared. 

“How did you find out?” Obi Wan finished his tea and pulled his cloak tighter around himself. He kept his eyes moving, scanning the horizon for signs of predators or raiders. “Cody said you knew about Anakin, about...what he is now.”

“I saw it on the holonews. Ahsoka,” he glanced at Kenobi at his sharp intake of breath. He realized he probably had no idea what the fate of his old friend (grand padawan? Sister?) had been. “She’s safe. She managed to separate me. Somehow deactivated my chip. She’s alright.”

Obi Wan closed his eyes briefly and nodded. “Good.”

Rex swirled the liquid in his cup. “Everyone was talking about how the chancellor turned out to be a Sith. They kept playing that feed from his office. I saw him." He stopped, sipped his cooling tea, continued. "My General. On his knees. Pledging himself to the enemy.” He chuckled darkly. “I guess I wasn’t the only man in the galaxy who felt like their soul was ripped out of their body that day."

"Sometimes I wish it had been." Obi Wan shook his head.

"Me too."

"Yet here we are. Still."

"Stubborn old di’kuts aren’t we?"

They laughed, cut too deep to cry.

"I really am sorry, Rex." Kenobi said finally, after they’d sat in companionable silence for a while.

“Don’t be. We’ve all done our best. Anyway, if I'd come sooner I would have known sooner, I just didn't want to show up without Cody if you did turn out to be here.”

Kenobi pulled at a loose thread in his cloak. Master Saito would have tsk’d at him for it. _If you didn’t leave so many of your cloaks on the ground during battle perhaps they would last longer Master Kenobi._

He pulled away, as he always did, from the memory, pushing down the uncomfortable churning in his gut that said he was alone and all the people he used to take for granted were gone never to return.

“How did you know I was alive?” He asked, changing the subject in his own mind.

“It was a hunch. If anyone could survive you could. You’ve gotten through worse.”

“Been reading up on me Rex?” Kenobi raised an eyebrow. His past wasn’t exactly a secret, but it wasn’t typically something he’d talked about for it to be known to the former Captain.

“No.” Rex shook his head with a fleeting smile. “Anakin...used to talk. When he was tired, mostly. Talked a lot about you.”

“Yes, well," Kenobi said, eyes shining too bright under the blanket of stars.

"It wasn't your fault, you know.” Rex said softly, but it was quiet in the desert, no wind to carry the words away and so they sank to the ground between them.

“It would be easier if he'd died.” His voice rough with unshed tears Rex pretended not to hear.

“He is. As far as I’m concerned. When he said his oath to that…to the enemy…He died. The man we knew and loved as Anakin Skywalker died that day." He said it so vehemently Kenobi couldn't find it in himself to argue. Rex always had his own way of looking at things. 

“Thank you for coming, Rex,” Kenobi said. “And for bringing Cody. It’s been…nice to have someone to talk to.”

Rex nodded, weary, as if he knew exactly what he meant.

“It’s been good. Still,” he cleared his throat, “I came with a purpose. Assuming I found you.”

“And you did.” Kenobi prompted him with an expectant eyebrow.

“Theres a rebellion forming. An organized resistance to what Vader and Palpatine are doing to the galaxy. Ahsoka is at the heart of it. We could use experienced men.”

“Rex…”

“You wouldn’t necessarily be fighting up close. We’ve got boots on the ground. What we need are leaders, people with experience and a head for strategy.”

Obi Wan pursed his lips and kept this eyes on the distant darkness, so Rex pressed on.

“Please. Come join us. Join the rebellion.”

The Jedi shook his head, that defeated slump back in his shoulders. “I can't. I need to stay to protect Luke.”

Obi Wan was not surprised by the silence, but the soft laughter that followed was certainly unexpected. He turned to see Rex giving him a piercing look and distinctly mocking smile.

“You really believe that don’t you?”

“What do you mean? Of course I do.”

“Protect him? Really? Ben _Kenobi_ , you're protecting Luke _Skywalker_ while he's in the care of...who? Anakin's step brother on the planet the man himself grew up on? C'mon General, that line may work on yourself but I wasn't decanted yesterday.” He looked away and set down his mug. “You're hiding. You're doing a damn good job of it but it’s still hiding.”

“I’m tired of war, Rex.” 

Rex knew he didn’t mean just tired. He meant bone weary exhaustion so deep and wide and consuming it made you question the worth of existence itself. Rex knew that tiredness intimately.

“I know. I am too. But if we do this right maybe Luke and Leia wont have to fight one.”

Obi Wan turned toward the east where the Lars homestead lay just beyond what he could see. He could sense it though. If he thought, and reached, he could feel Luke, one of the last little lights in a universe that used to be filled with them. Little Luke. With his round face and white blonde hair, who looked so much like his father had when he became Obi Wan’s Padawan that he’d had to stop going to see him lest he lose his mind completely.

Little Luke. Full of innocence and wonder, who wanted to travel to every planet in the universe one day. Just like a slave boy Obi Wan once knew.

Little Luke. Who shouldn’t be doomed to a life of oppression under the thumb of the Empire. Who didn’t deserve to die in a war his predecessors never saw coming.

“You're right.” He said finally, Rex’s eyes still boring into him. He turned to meet them. “What do we need to do?”

Rex reached up to grip Kenobi’s shoulder. The Jedi couldn’t remember the other man ever initiating physical contact with him before. That alone was enough reason for him to want to do away with rank forever. If only for his friends to feel comfortable reaching out to him.

“Sleep, tonight. Tomorrow we can talk plans, General.” Rex said, then promptly yawned wide to prove his point.

“I’m not your General anymore.”He said, not quite saying what he meant.

“Its a sign of respect. Has nothing to do with rank." Rex said, hearing it anyway.

"In that case, lead the way. Captain." Kenobi said, smiling.

"I suppose I deserved that." Rex shook his head as Obi Wan climbed to his feet.

"Yes you did. Now let’s go kick Cody out of my bunk."

"Yeah," Rex took the proffered hand and a familiar weightlessness brought him to his feet when Kenobi pulled him up, "he always was a blanket hog anyway."

They walked back to Kenobi’s hut side by side and left eternal solitude behind.

Two old soldiers who’d vanquished the hardest enemy either had ever had to face.


End file.
